♥ above all else, cling to love ♥

I swear I was going to write in here before (as I thought I already had a two hundred ninety four), but... guess not.

( my life )

Gotta go, though. I have choir practice in an hour (for Simbang Gabi, which is next week, which I will ALSO be happy when it is behind me). I also have to make sure my brother gets fed. Sigh.

Wow, I'm kind of really tired.

( crazy day )

I'm going to go sit in my bathtub and use one of the Lush bath bombs I bought. Hopefully I feel better then. Sorry for whining. It's just been a very long, exhausting day.

Here's to a better one tomorrow.

notes to self:

( for my personal use, feel free to skip )

Okay, time to go get ready to go back to Riverside. Whoo. Exciting times. ...well, really, they are exciting - we're putting up our Christmas decorations today! Yay! And I will most likely stop by Starbucks, because, you know, I can. :)

Dear Matt: pls to be stop talking now, kk? SERIOUSLY. Ugh. I love you, but you're no good when I have no way to channel you, since you won't give me anything for an NPC. Blahhh.

Ahem. In other news:

( thanksgiving festivities )

Peter's coming in two hours, so I'm going to try and get some homework done before he gets here. Later, gators. ♥♥

Oh yeah... I'm about to install a new Glee mood theme. YAY! edit: Done. Took forever and a day to upload all the little icons, but I did it! Sooo excited. I love this mood theme, not only because it's hilarious, but because JOSH GROBAN is in two of them! That's like, epic win x infinity!

I probably shouldn't put these here, but whatev. It's more convenient that way.

Meme #1: Comment here with one of your characters and one of mine. I'll write a love letter my character would have written.

Meme #2: The Pizza Meme: What do your characters like on their pizzas?
( pizza for everyone! )

I know I still owe meme tags from the songfic meme, and I'll try to get to them this week. It is my week off, after all. :) I can't remember the last time I woke up on a Monday in Chino Hills.

A somewhat involved to-do list:

( to-do )

Now back to your regularly scheduled friends list. */random* Oh yeah - if anyone wants any of my charries for a thread, let me know! This is a good week for me to play. :)

OH MY GOSH.

This is completely random, but I just realized that cello guy from HSM = MATT. HAHAHAH. Awesome. (Also, this movie really makes me miss NSB.)

I promise I'm not mood swinging. I'm just watching HSM because it makes me feel better. Thanks for your love and concern; I appreciate it. ♥

So, the last few weeks (months?) there have been times when I feel like I've been getting sick, but it's never really dissolved into anything sick-like, so I don't know if there's something living in me, waiting for my immune system to go wonky (that sounds kind of gross, doesn't it?), or what, but this weekend I've been feeling kind of under the weather. I mean, I've been able to do my normal routine, but I get wiped out really easily, and today we think I might have started running a fever. I don't usually get freaked out unless I start running a fever, you know? So we'll see. I took Tylenol at about 7, but I still feel kind of hot. And I have had this just dull headache with me all day and I don't think it's due to lack of sleep or stress or whatever - it feels like the headache you have when you get sick.

Even if I am sick, I hope it doesn't stay forever. I have a lot to do this week. Sigh. First up, working from 7 - 3 tomorrow. We'll see how that goes. I need to talk to my boss about my future there. Hmm.

Showering, boyfriend time on phone, and sleeping. Guh. This sucks.

p.s.: My red velvet cupcakes were amazing. :)

A random list of things that freak me out, for no apparent reason:

-When I'm driving and people honk at me. Most of the time, it's for other reasons than my driving, but it always makes me think I'm doing something wrong, or that I'm about to, you know, get smashed by a truck or something, and... yeah, that always unnerves me.

-Disaster movies. I can't do them. Yeah, they're movies, and they're supposed to be fiction, but... if we're going to have to live through it anyway, why do we have to make a form of entertainment to watch one person's interpretation of it? Really?

-When I walk into my house and no one else is home and it's dark, but the TV's on. I don't know why that bothers me so much but it really sets me on guard. (Like right now. I bet you anything my cousins ran out and forgot to turn off the TV. WHYYYYY. That's like, the most money that you spend on electricity.) It bothers me even more when it's a blank screen.

-Bees. *shudder*

-Pictures of things that look like they have holes in them (this is hard to explain, but the best example I can give is what hyaline cartilage - it's a type of cartilage that you can find in your ear - looks like under a microscope. [I'm talking about the bottom part of the picture. When I had to do this for A&P it freaked me out every time.) Seriously, it like, gives me the heebie jeebies and I get goosebumps all over my body and it's just... ugh.

I don't even know why I made this list. It was probably because I heard the TV on in my cousins' room. Alas. Now I need to go turn it off for my own sanity.

In other news, still have lots to do and still unsure of exactly what I should do. Too cold to hang laundry, pointless to cook banana bread, do not want to start a mind map or the NIH stroke scale study thingy. I'm thinking, though, if I make the cupcakes tomorrow, I might harass myself. We'll see. I guess packing looks like the most realistic thing right now... that and trying to get a mind map out of the way. (Did make the chicken parm, though. Yum.)

Also? My dad IMs me telling me 'mom says she hasn't heard from her sissy' (sissy = me), so I tell them to Skype me (the reception in my room is crap unless I stand like, away from my computer and my TV and my bed), and they do, and then my mom like, talks to me for like, five minutes and is like "okay, bye." It's a good thing I talked to her, though. I had a dream on Wednesday night that she died, and I couldn't stop crying in my dream, and I think I woke up crying. So yeah, realistically I should have called her on Thursday. No excuses. Sigh.

(I still have the chills from that picture. Ugh.)

I shouldn't even be procrastinating in this journal. Alas. Love to all. ♥

It's only 11:15 am, and so far, I have:

-done a few loads of laundry
-done the CalNoc... tutorial, I guess, on pressure ulcers (ewww)
-made myself breakfast (and eaten it)... garlic fried rice, Vienna sausage, and scrambled eggs. The joys of being Filipino. :D
-finally cleared the clogged drain in my bathroom sink
-cleared out some stuff to take back to Riverside
-started packing for Riverside

I have to shower and stuff, and then I'm meeting Esther for a project we have to do in a few weeks (you see, it's totally critical care week this week). After that, depending on when I get back, I'm going to church, doing one more load of laundry, making red velvet cupcakes and/or banana bread (there are some sad looking bananas that know they want to get made into yummy banana bread), and possibly chicken parmigiana, but that's a little ambitious. I'm making something with chicken, though.

Oh yeah, I gotta finish packing for Riverside and do my epi homework. And maybe, just maybe, I might get started on a mind map for Friday. Or the NIH stroke study, but that sucks up four hours of my time. Alas.

And of course, since I like to multitask, if anyone wants a muse for a party thread, let me know. I'll try and get something started.

It's been a busy, but fulfilling weekend.

I sang at four Masses (one was a wedding), spent time with my family, did some RP stuff, bought some new makeup (it's an investment, see - my liquid eyeliner died and my mascara is full of fail, so I got myself some good stuff from MAC, so you can actually see it when I sing), did some homework stuff, and just now, added my Christmas music to my computer and uploaded some Christmas icons! *points* I also cleaned up my icons in general and changed my default... yeah.

I forgot how happy Christmas music makes me feel, except when it's in a store, for some reason. But Christmas music in my car is love. Except when it's a gazillion degrees outside. This reminds me - I made two Christmas mixes last year and wanted to upload and share them, but I couldn't remember my Photobucket password to share the graphics. I'll see if I saved them on my hard drive - if I did, and still have most of the songs, I will share this year. (Because seriously, I was so proud of them. :D)

I'm sad my weekend went by so fast. However, I don't have to be in Redlands until 12 tomorrow, and when this week is over, I will only have 46 hours to complete. That sounds so much better than the 80 I was freaking out over earlier in the month/semester. AND, writing the paper counts in the hours. SCORE.

I realized how lucky I am today when my boyfriend texted me and told me, "I miss you a lot today, I dreamt of you last night and it made me miss you even more." Seriously, any girl would love to hear that. ♥

Pretty random and slightly pointless post. Love to all.

Today, I walked out of the hospital and I wanted to write. I wanted to describe how the air felt, how the lights looked, and it made me want to fic not one but two things (the songfics from the meme a few days ago). I came home with half a mind to write.

However, I was sidetracked by my family, aggravated by the fact that my passport photo thing isn't working, and my boyfriend called and said he was coming (to Riverside! like the old days! <3) and so... yeah. I updated for KJ, though she came out... not exactly like I wanted her to. Oh well. But I want to write. Alas.

( life, as we know it )

Tomorrow: funeral, passport pictures, lunch with Peter, upper lip/eyebrow wax, nap?, Redlands 3 - 11
Wednesday: Laundry, sweep floor, epi studying, massage?, music rearrangement on iPod/Annaliese, Matt entry, leadership/management journal, write-up for critical care
Tagbacks as needed (which reminds me, I have a Lauren tag to do *does*)

A random, floating, non-fixed to do list: fill out FAFSA, print out skills checklist, begin working on portfolio (!!!) and resume (!!!)

...that's all. Yeah.

There's a lot of plotting and playing to be done for the game, but for some reason, I just... can't get into it lately. I don't know if it's because of school, or because KJ doesn't like dealing with the awkward, or what. I want to play; I want my characters to be doing stuff for Halloween and interacting with people. But they're all chillin' in some corner in the back of my head, just... kicking back and doing their own thing. Maybe that's a sign that I'm don't have the time to give them the plots they deserve. Alas.

But yeah, if you want any of them, let me know. Just... you know.

I'm sitting here waiting for trick-or-treaters to come and I'm dressed up as Minnie Mouse, and I can't believe I forgot the ears I bought yesterday to go with the costume. Alas. I have half a mind to wear it tomorrow to Disneyland, but if I do that, the shoes are going to get torn apart (they're like house slippers). I'll wear the ears tomorrow, though, I guess.

I have a few minutes until the little trick or treaters come around, and I don't know what to do with myself. I told myself I'd do game stuff because I've been severely lacking, but... yeah. I'll try. We'll see how my muses cooperate.

Stolen from starsguard:

Rules:
(1) Choose a fandom or game from the list
(2) Choose a character and/or pairing
(3) Choose a song from my recently played list. If you're feeling ambitious, give me a lyric from your chosen song.
(4) PROFIT! Er, I mean, let me write you a drabbly thing. (Or longer. I love songfics.)

( here's your pieces )

Have at it! Also - this wasn't on my to-do list but I totally wrote two pages of my project paper. Whoo.

Answers for this meme are going in imagine_this. :)

Happy Saturday, everyone! For once, I have nothing to do on a Saturday, and I love it! There are little things I have to do, yeah, but nothing ~*pressing*~ or ~*major*~. :D

So one of the things I did was fix up Matt's Facebook profile - lookie! So proud, heh. I also fixed up KJ's, and updated it a little bit. *nods* I don't know if the rest of my kids will get one, but we'll see.

( A to-do list )

So the night before clinical I didn't sleep very well - I barely got four hours of sleep. Last night I made up for it by sleeping like, 12 hours (hee), but yesterday I was starting to feel kind of weird - and two people were telling me that it sounded like I was getting sick. I thought it might go away by sleeping, but now as I sit here I still feel kind of woozy. It's nothing major, but my throat still feels awkward and my head feels like it's starting to get pressurized, so I'm hoping I don't get full-blown sick. Peter won't see me if I'm sick and I want to go out and do stuff but I don't want to spread disease, haha. (I think he got all butthurt when he was like "you know if you're sick, I can't see you for at least a week" and I was like "oh well", but honestly, I've been through it enough with him that it's just something I have to deal with. It was like he was trying to guilt trip me. I'm sorry that your immune system sucks, but I'm allowed to get sick once in a while okay? Ugh.) So yeah.

I think I'm going to go tackle this list and get some food in me. Chicken asparagus soup sounds yummy. Om nom.

An example of the convoluted world we live in:

Last weekend, my bff Cristina IMed me (or I IMed her, one or the other) and we started talking about how we miss each other and we should hang out. So, a few days ago I e-mailed her to ask her what we should do, and she e-mailed me back, but I never got back, so today she @replied to me on Twitter and said "call me!" But I just got it and it's kind of late, so I texted her to ask her if she could talk, and she texted me back saying we can talk tomorrow.

Oh, technology. ;)

( rambly rambly things )

Why do boys need to be so infuriating?

( elaboration )

Also, I was stuck in traffic getting to Riverside, and the Filipino Choir people were being more annoying than usual. Seriously, half of them weren't singing because apparently socializing was more important.

UGHHHHHHHHHH. Seriously, I've felt like throwing things at people for the last few hours.

I really do think it's hormones, though. My mood swings are intense this time around, and it's horrible. I hate it. Plus I get all the boob issues and that's more annoying than anything.

I'm also cranky because now it's 10:30 and I have to go to bed so I can wake up early and sing tomorrow. Oh, my life. Sigh.

Happy Friday. :)

It's my first night at home in Chino Hills by myself with no real obligations in about a week, and I'm so excited. I would take advantage of it, but I'm really, really tired. (No, seriously. Peter asked me if he could stay here tonight and I nearly cried. But he was cool about it.)

However, I do have a lot of things to do this weekend and next week. However, next week is furlough week for the school, which means I actually don't have to go to class for most of the week and my crazy Thursday is FREEEEEEE! :)

( Schedule + To Do )

I swear there was more. Really. But I am exhausted, and I still have a lot to do, and this weekend isn't going to be much rest, either, so... yeah. :( Peace out, loves.

Okay, seriously, I shouldn't be here, shouldn't be on my computer, shouldn't have updated for KJ this morning. But... here I am.

My brother's first choir concert of the year was last night, and he Rick Rolled everyone there. It was EPIC. Hee! And he did so good, too. :)

I just realized that this week is the halfway point in my semester. What do I have to show for it? CRAP. In 8 weeks, I have to finish a project, write a paper (that "should be no longer than 15 pages"... yuck), and get at least 115 clinical hours in. That's gonna be fun. */sarcasm* Yeah, so I'm stressing out just a bit here.

I hope it didn't rain too hard that my car got wet. It was fine yesterday so... *crosses fingers*

I'm going home tonight for the first time since Sunday, and I'll really only be there two nights this week and I'm coming back here next week. Fun times? *shrugs*

...Yeah, this is kind of pointless. More later. *flees*

A list.

+Getting a lot of sleep
+Not having to work this week
+Being able to get a lot of stuff done for school this week
+No care plans
+Going to Panera this morning (if I get out of here on time)
+Being able to lock my Twitter and still have it connect with my Facebook.

+/- Confusing feelings, due to muses, my life, my relationship with my boyfriend, uncertainties about the future.
+/- Week 8 of the semester. Halfway done. This is exciting, except I have a midterm on Thursday and I've just barely started on my project. Which means the next 8 weeks are going to be craaaaazy! Not to mention I have two ATI tests next week that I should at least try to study for, although one we've never even had the class on. Fail, nursing program... fail.
+/- CSUF finally paid me the money they didn't cover when the fee increases hit. However, I had to use that money to pay off credit cards that I used for gas.

-My parents are gone. This means I have to play 'responsible adult,' and already I have crises. Mostly with cars.
-This also means five million little things I have to remember to do - locking up the house, turning off the light we turn on at night, getting the mail.
-Midterm on Thursday, and doing leadership stuff two days this week. Here's hoping I can stay for a little today and stay longer on Wednesday. *nods*

( the old to-do list )

Lord, please, PLEASE don't let me get down about today. I was doing so well for the past few days.

edit: So, I drove all the way to Redlands to discover that my preceptor is sick. :( She was like, "you can go talk to Steve and see if he'll help you with your clinical hours," but I was like, "you know what, I have research to do that I don't have to do here, so I'll do that instead." And I do. I was starting to worry about getting that part done because I was staying at the hospital just watching, and I kind of want to do other things as well. So. New to-do list.

-Go home and change; get glasses and dirty clothes.
-Upper lip wax
-Call Kaiser again and see if they can squeeze me in tomorrow. Or maybe today. We'll see.
-Head back to Chino Hills: get coat, boots, toner, and a pair of jeans. Hang up scrubs/other pair of jeans.
-Grocery shopping at Winco
-Come back and do some research (hopefully like 2 hours, 3 hours - don't get distracted!!!)
-Figure out the car situation
-Dinner
-Study for epi quiz and critical care

My muffin is done so I'm going to go now to do all of this. *flees*

So glad it's the weekend. After finding out that I don't really have to do care plans this semester, it made my life easier.

( growing up and moving on )

Yeah. I have to go do stuff now so I can be in Riverside by 12. Laundry, shower, breakfast... om nom. I feel like eating Cinnamon Toast Crunch, hee.